Lighting for Profits - Episode #211

From corporate leadership coach to master-certified life coach, Jody Moore has guided over 100,000 people toward joy and success. Specializing in moms with Christian values and coaching entrepreneurs, Jody combines wisdom and practicality to help you create a life you love. With millions of downloads of her Better Than Happy podcast and a best-selling book, she brings inspiration and tools that actually work.

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Episode Transcript

Welcome to Lighting for Profits, hosted by Ryan Lee

Welcome to Lighting for Profits. All light, All Light, All Light powered by EmeryAllen. Here is your host, Ryan Lee.

Oh.

Ah, light a lot of light.

Ryan Lee: If you're looking to start or grow a landscape lighting business

Welcome, welcome, welcome to the number one landscape lighting show in Carlsbad, California. It's Lighting for Profits powered by Emory Allen. So excited to be here with you all today. We got an awesome show lined up. Ms. Jody Moore. Jody Moore, coaching, coming on the show. Actually, it's, she's been on the show before and, was highlighted as one of the favorite episodes on our 200th episode. So I was like, hey, we gotta have her back. Let's reach out, see if she can join us. So today's gonna be a great show for you. excited to have Jody on and, it's fun to nerd out on some of the same things that we have in common. So, I'm excited to have her on and have her have her perspective. again, if you're looking to start or grow a landscape lighting business, you're definitely in the right place. We're here to educate and motivate to help you dominate. And, just as a quick reminder, we're like two weeks out, two weeks from Secret Summit, September 25th through 27th. West Palm Beach, Florida. it's going to be epic. So if you're not a member of Lighting Academy or Landscape Lighting Secrets and you want to come, then you got to join one of those. And actually you can join Lighting Academy just for a buck. You can try it for a dollar for a week. but if you really want to step up your game, get in Landscape Lighting Secrets and you'll be invited to this annual members only meetup. I want to see you guys there in just a couple weeks. so if you have questions on that, not, sure if you should be there or not, just message me or send me an email to support Ryan Lee coaching dot com. And, I want to thank you guys so much for your support. Really, really appreciate it. It's just a privilege to be able to do this show, every single week and, have amazing guests on. And again, in just a few minutes, we're gonna have Jody Moore join us.

Nels Peterson passed away unexpectedly over the weekend

Before we get started today, I, want to take a moment just to honor someone very special in our industry. yesterday, I was informed that over the weekend we lost Nels Peterson unexpectedly. And, if it's okay, I just want to read something. I kind of couldn't really gather my thoughts, so I wrote something down that I wanted to share. in honor of Him. Nels was more than just a talented lighting designer and leader. He was a mentor, a friend, and a true light in the world of landscape lighting. He had a gift for making people feel seen, supported and inspired. Whether he was helping franchisees succeeded, assisting manufacturers in business development, serving on the AOLP board, a, mentor for illy, or just sharing his passion for design, one of the things I always admired about Nels was his direct approach to life. You always knew exactly where you stood with him and honestly, sometimes he'd tell you whether you asked or not. And that honesty mixed with his sense of humor made him refreshing to be around and earned him the respect of so many in this industry. He leaves behind a legacy of creativity, generosity and leadership that will continue to impact this industry for years to come. Our thoughts and our prayers are with his family, friends and everyone who had the privilege of knowing him. He will be deeply missed. So I'm still processing, this, but I thought it was important to pay tribute to a lighting, legend in this industry. So rest in peace, Nels Peterson.

The moment you take ownership of your business is liberating, right

So, as you guys know, I usually start with a thought and and again, we're gonna have Jody Moore on in a few minutes, but I was talking to a client earlier today and they were dealing with some issues which, hey, if you own a business, you're probably, probably dealing with some issues, putting out a lot of fires and a lot of things slipping through the cracks. And what I found is that as this particular individual has developed his business and actually done a lot of things really, really well, so now he's got more time, he's bought back his time, now he's starting to audit everything, right? So you start to audit your people, start to audit your processes. And you know what's frustrating is it's frustrating because you think, oh, I'm going to do this thing, I'm going to replace myself in business and then I'll be happy. But the problem is you have more time to find the holes, find the cracks, find the areas that need improvement. And you start asking things like, why would someone not catch this? I mean, I'm the owner, I'm not even, you know, doing this job on a daily basis. How could I in five minutes find this problem when it's this person's full time job to do this position? And it's super frustrating because you're like, I did all the things I was supposed to do. You know, I, I, I, I, I got our business up to this certain amount of revenue And I hired the right people, and I got them in the right place, and now I'm discovering all these problems. And that's frustrating, right? But here's the uncomfortable truth that I had to tell my client. You hired that person. You trained that person. So why are you blaming them? And I want you to write this down, because this is really kind of the big takeaway is the moment. The moment that you take ownership of the mess that you've made, you reclaim the power to clean it up. And this is one of those instances where I'm almost writing this and. And talking about this as I'm talking to myself, because this is not an area that I've got it all figured out. Okay? I just want to have full transparency there. But, you know, if you hit. If you hit me with this on the wrong day, I'm probably going to get super defensive. Like, what, you want me to take ownership for someone else's mistakes? Are you kidding me? I'm probably going to be pretty defensive, right? But when you understand this, really, at its core, it's absolutely. It's just truth, right? And it's actually, instead of getting defensive, I. It's liberating. Like, it actually gives me peace. It gives me a breath of fresh air. I'm like, oh, wow. And the reason is because you're now able to control the controllables. My very first sales trainer taught me that phrase, and I think about it, at least on a weekly basis, if not the daily, control the controllables because it gives you the ability, it gives you the strength, it gives you the power to be in control when you take ownership of it. One of the most frustrating things in life for me is when you don't have things you can control. So, like, if. If you want to go, I was talking to Jody, right before the show, going to the beach. If I want to go to the show or the. The beach, and it's raining. Like, that's frustrating. Like, I. I went on vacation, and I just want to be on the beach for a couple days, and it rains. Like, that's frustrating. I. I can't control that. Right? the economy. It's frustrating when people want to hold on to their money a little bit more. Right? it's frustrating when people have opinions that are different than mine. You can't control these things. You can't control how you look like, I wish I could. I wish I didn't have wrinkles and stuff. but. But seriously, some cards are just dealt, right? But here's what's very empowering. When you take ownership of the problems in your life now, suddenly you take ownership of the control. And so you can do something about it. Like, this is what I love about it. Like, you have to be humble enough and you have to not get defensive, right? But when you do, it's very liberating. It's like, oh, wow, I feel so much better now because now I can actually see the problem and I just have to clean it up. Like, oh, well, that's. You know, no one really ever told. Tells you this when you start a business. But you're not starting a landscape planning business, you're not starting a coaching business, you're not starting a, whatever you're doing. All you're doing is starting a business that you're just going to solve problems. Like, that's what you do. And, you know, when you think about, like, the most successful people in the world, that's what they do. They solve problems. And what they do is they solve problems faster than the norm. And in fact, probably the most successful people, they solve bigger problems than the norm, and they solve bigger problems faster than the norm. So it's very empowering. It's liberating. It means I don't have to accept what's happening to me, right? I can control the controllable. So if I have an office manager that's not doing their job good, I just need to do a better job training, right? I just need a better job setting expectations. And if I've done those things and they're still not performing well, good, then I just need to get someone else. Right? There's actual solutions to the problems. But if you blame others, it's like, well, the problem's them and what's the solution? Like, you're just gonna keep hiring and firing people. Like, that's, that's insanity. Right?

Most successful people don't all come from rich families, right

So. But truly, the most successful people that, that I, that I think about, they have one thing in common and it's. They all come from rich families. No, they don't all come from rich families. I used to, I, I did used to think I'm like, man, I'm so glad that I don't come from a rich family because I earned it, you know? And then you meet someone with a rich family, you're like, dang. Actually, that would be kind of cool. Like their uncle's like a prince or something. Like, man, actually, I could probably get used to that. but no, I'm. I'm kind of half kidding. I Think because I, it does feel good to earn your stripes. It does feel good to earn something and create your own economy. And, and the ripple effect, you guys of your. Even if you're just like, I'm just a solo one man show, like, trust me, there's a ripple effect there. Like the, the, the distributors you buy from, the manufacturers you buy from, the, the clients that you serve. Like one small business has a huge ripple effect. So that is, that is what's awesome.

Take ownership of everything falling apart in front of you. And when you do this, you have hope

But all these successful people, they have this thing in common and it's that they solve problems faster than the norm. And I don't know, maybe I might have just told you the secret to success. I don't know. I'm still figuring it out too. But I think that's one of them, I really think it is, is like if you can get accustomed to solving problems and solve them at a faster rate than normal and solve bigger problems faster than most people, like, you're gonna win. And so if you're having, you know, a, ah, team member problem or you're having a problem delegating or getting something to do something, well, start with you assume that you are the problem, take ownership and clean up the mess. And when you do this, you have hope because you're like, oh, I can do something about this. If you can't do something about it, it's like, this sucks. You're sitting on a rainy beach and it's supposed to be sunny. Like it's very frustrating. But you can control these things, right? So stop sitting in your negativity. that doesn't help. And if you are literally waiting and relying on other people and everything around you to go perfect, like it's going to be kind of a depressing life. So when you realize that you created the mess, it gives you the power to clean it up. And here's what's cool. And I was talking to this client earlier today, man, they can't see this because they're in it and it feels very messy and chaotic. But from an outside perspective, I'm like, you guys are so close. Like they're sitting on so much potential and it's these small tweaks that are going to make the biggest difference. And I'm telling you, when they solve these little tweaks, they're going to explode. Like they're going to take over the world. And chances are, so are you. There's a phrase, small hinges swing big doors. And when you focus on just these small tweaks, just small tweaks at a time stop blaming others and instead take ownership and do these things. And suddenly you see your full potential. And, you know, unless you've got this thing called life figured out, you're most likely sitting in front, like I imagine, this huge Runway in front of you, just wide open and so much opportunity. So I want to encourage you to take ownership of everything falling apart in front of you. If it feels chaotic, if it feels messy, just take ownership of it. Because now you've identified the problem. Now you can solve the problem. Now you can clean up the mess. And now you can keep moving forward. So that's my message for you today, guys.

Emory Allen believes every lighting professional should have access to a

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Jody Moore is a business coach and also a life coach

Welcome to the show, Ms. Jody Moore. How you doing, Jody?

So good. I loved your message. I was writing it down Giving you amens back here.

Yes. Thank you. I could feel it. I couldn't hear it, but I could feel it. Thank you.

Yes. Good, Good stuff.

Well, I'm really, really excited to have you. On, we did our 200th episode, and we had some of our top people on from our top episodes. And you got a shout out. We're like, what's your favorite episode? And like, the one with Jody Moore, I'm like, heck, yeah. So thanks so much for coming back on the show.

Thank you. Congratulations on 200 episodes.

Thank you.

Milestone.

It's. It, was. I was like, we've done 200 since. I think someone should, like, fact check, make sure we actually did do one.

Have you gone back and watched your first ones and seen your progress?

I should, but I don't. I. I just keep moving forward.

I love it.

I really don't. Like, I'm annoyed by how I look by sound, on camera, all this stuff.

Yeah. Well, congratulations. That's a big accomplishment.

Thanks so much. Well, I appreciate it. And it's kind of ironic because, you know, our industry is definitely male dominated. We have some, some female business owners that do badass stuff, but primarily it's, you know, it's males. And so I thought it was cool that you got the shout out because you, you know, you coach business owners, but you also are a life coach. And, it seems like you're normally coaching women, so it was cool that, we got your perspective and it was one of our faves.

That was very flattering to me as well. I appreciate it. Yeah, I do coach. I coach mostly women. I tend to attract women, but I do have a handful of men. And I, I think, you know, you and I are talking about the same ideas in our own ways, and I think people recognize truth when it lands. So that's very fun. Yeah.

Do me a favor. Just do a quick introduction of, of who Jody is and how you got into this space.

Okay. so I had a traditional career in corporate for many years, did lots of different things, but towards the end of my career, ended up as a leadership coach. And so I was trained a little bit in. I was coaching salespeople and managers and directors of sales teams. And that's when I really, felt the power of coaching tools in general. Kind of went down a rabbit hole of studying all the self help, all the mindset, all the, you know, trendy cliche words, that we hear nowadays. And, and then after about 17 years at the same company, I was let go along with most of the company that went on, basically went through major downsizing and felt really lost, like not sure what I was going to do. you know, I'm in the thick of having kids at this point and so I thought maybe I'm going to be a stay at home mom. But I never really was cut out for that, to be honest. So, so anyway, I went through a life coach training mostly because I didn't know anything else that sounded appealing and just couldn't stop talking about all the things I was learning. And so from there I started building a business. I've been doing this now about 11 years. So like you said, I've built most of my business coaching, women who are stay at home moms for the most part on how to be more confident, stop yelling at your kids, up, you know, change your habits, eating habits, whatever. lots of marriage, relationship coaching, all that. And then in the last few years I've also started coaching other coaches on the marketing and the sales and the business building side of being a coach, the entrepreneurial side. So I love what I do. So fun.

Congrats on making a career that you absolutely love. It's very cool.

Thank you. Thank you.

What are some common things that you've seen that people face roadblocks

What are some common things that you've seen? you know, we're, we talk, we talk about tactics and stuff like that, of course, but what are some common things that you see that are roadblocks for people? whether it's business or personal, whatever, like just in, in terms of like who, who human beings are and what holds people back?

Well, it's exactly what you were just talking about, right? So I love how you talked about that. When you own a business, right, you think you have a lighting business, you think you have a coaching business, whatever, but you actually have a problem solving business. and in order to solve the problem, you have to clearly understand what the problem actually is. And exactly like you were saying, Ryan, I find that the human brain, for whatever reason, is hyper focused on things outside of us, right? We're very aware of the people around us, the environment around us, because it's easy to see. we're less aware of what's happening internally inside of us. So when you talk about, you know, like let's say I have an office manager who's not performing, right. I'm usually when I'm coaching somebody in a situation like that, they'll tell me about what the office manager is doing or not doing. And they're very. And they'll even tell me I kind of think they feel this way, or maybe they, they don't really like this job or they don't take it seriously. Like, we have all kinds of guesses about what people are thinking and feeling and where they're coming from and their behaviors and everything else, right? And when we turn it around and I say, okay, I understand your office manager, but I want to know you, what's happening for you? What are you thinking? What are you feeling like when your office manager does, comes in late to work? Let's just say, what do you make that mean about yourself or your business? And usually people are like, I don't know, like we're so stumped about what we think and we're so sure of what everybody else is thinking. So I'm constantly trying to show people, listen, you don't know what that other person is thinking first of all, but you definitely don't have control over that. So let's redirect to what you're thinking instead. And the reason why is I do have a framework I teach that illustrates this if you want me to walk through it. But the way I'm thinking, let's say the way I'm thinking about my office manager is creating how I feel about them. And the way I'm thinking and feeling is driving the way I show up, what I say to them, the tone in which I say it, whether or not I have the conversation that I need to be having as, you, know, a leader, or if I avoid it or if I just kind of sugarcoat it and I'm not direct enough or clear enough, right? So I always say, listen, if you are coming to me telling me you have an employee not doing your job, doing their job, excuse me, I guarantee in some way you're not doing your job as a leader. And that's what's happening in terms of how I show up. So how, how I think creates how I feel and how I feel drives how I show up. Even though we try to hide it, right? We're pretty good at pretending. Like, I wouldn't, directly say, I feel like you don't respect me, but I might say something different, but they're going to read it in my body language. That's why communication is 80% body language. They're going to read it in my lack of eye contact. They're going to get the sense that I don't respect them, them. And therefore I'm going to continue to create the reality I believe in, which is this person's not doing Their job, but it's really just me not doing my job. Because like you said, if I do my job, either train them better, coach them better, set more clear expectations, or I execute whatever strategy. Get either. We always used to just say, you either coach them in or you coach them out. Right. So anyway, when people become more aware of what's happening inside of them and less aware of what's happening outside of them, less focused, I should say, nothing wrong with being aware, but less hyper focused on what's happening outside of them, that's when we become empowered. And not only do we solve these problems and things, but we actually, you know, really massively can create massive success.

Okay, very cool. So I, I mean, I understand it. I'm hoping other people do. So if we understand that, okay, we're not going to assume what this other person's thinking, we're going to take control of what we're thinking. so that dictates how we feel and how we show up. But then how do we exercise that? Like, how do I. Now I'm aware of the problem. Is there tools you can share where I'm like, okay, you're right, I do have that problem. How do I fix that on Monday morning or like in an hour after this phone call?

Yeah, yeah. The first step is just separate out facts from thoughts or stories. Because we all think our thoughts are just true, right? Like this employee doesn't respect me. You might even be right about it. Our thoughts are not always not true. Sometimes they are true, right? It could be that they don't respect you, or that they don't take this job seriously, or they're not going to succeed, or you hired the wrong person or whatever. But I always just say, okay, let's just separate out facts from thoughts. So facts are things that are really simple, provable in a court of law, scientifically provable. So if so this employee doesn't respect me. Never going to be a fact. Because we couldn't take them to the doctor and say, can you do a blood draw and see, I think this person might be negative for respect. Right? Like we're never going to prove that in a court of law. Even if the person says, I don't really respect her, Our feelings change from day to day and from moment to moment. So we're never going to make that a fact. Fact might be, my employee has come late to work three times in the last month. Something really benign. Facts are really benign. Right. The weather, like you said, is a fact. the economy, the, the state of the economy is a fact, but most of us could never actually articulate it in a factual way. Like, the economy's down. Not a fact. That's a thought. That's a story. Because what does that even mean? How are you measuring that? Right? So we just want to separate out facts from thoughts. That's the first step that I would recommend for anybody listening. That's like, okay, you're right. How do I. How do I get a handle on this? And what you'll recognize is that most of what you're. What's happening in your mind is thinking. And that means it's optional. Okay? Now people think. The next thing I'm going to say is, so just think more positively. And, nothing wrong with being more positive. But I. What I want to recommend is more complicated than that. It's not necessarily think positive.

You can pick any emotion you want as you go into your business today

I don't want you to. I'm not like a big fan of just looking in the mirror saying positive affirmations to try to feel better. I just want you to choose more intentionally how you're going to think about this situation so that it empowers you, so that it helps you show up how you want to be in this situation, be the person that you want, who you want to be in this situation. So sometimes I'll ask myself, how do I want to feel if my. If my office manager is not performing and I'm frustrated? That's not going to serve me. How do I want to feel when my office manager doesn't perform? How do I want to feel about the economy? How do I want to feel when I go to the beach and it's raining? You want to feel frustrated. Nope. Nothing wrong with that. You absolutely can. But if you don't want to, then you have to find a different way to think about it. So maybe I want to feel committed. Maybe I want to feel determined. Maybe I want to feel, confident. You literally get to feel anything you want. So I always say to people, like, imagine I have a whole platter full of emotions. And I'm like, please, what would you like today? You can pick any emotion in the world as you go into your business, today. And you're like, I'll take frustrated, please. That's what most people are doing, right? But no, frustrated. What is that going to do for me? Nothing. It causes me to not do my job when they're not doing their job. So instead, again, we, could pick one, like, let's just say committed, determined. Those are kind of similar. Like, okay, I'm going to. I'm going to make sure we take care of this problem. That's a much more useful emotion because it helps me show up, helps me be more courageous and brave. It helps me say what I need to say, do what I need to do. Okay, what is a thought? I already believe in this situation that makes me feel more determined or committed. Instead of this. This guy doesn't. Or this woman or whoever. This person doesn't respect me, how about I know how to do my job? And so either this person will get coached up or they'll get coached out. I'm just going to show up and do my job, and then whatever happens will be meant to be. It doesn't matter whether they respect me or not. You see what I'm saying?

Yeah.

So, again, it's, People will often say to me, but it's true. What if it's true? I'm like, it doesn't matter that it's true. You walking around thinking, this person doesn't respect me is not serving you. So how about you find something to focus on that's more useful? It doesn't mean that that thought isn't in the back of your mind somewhere. It's just not your main driver. It's not your focus. So if your focus is like, I will. I know how to. It doesn't matter if they're doing their job, because I know how to do my job. Then you become empowered. It's going to change everything in the way that you show up. Yeah, I know. That still feels a little all over the place. So tell me where it's,

I love it because it is empowering. I used to. Maybe it's because I don't like talking about my feelings, but.

Oh, well, I'm glad I'm here today.

I'm about to get an invoice. This is turning into a therapy session.

You're about to get free coaching on YouTube live.

Yeah, well, I. I usually call it my attitude because I think it's. Because I don't like to say the word feelings, but like it. It's true. Control your attitude. And I like the way you said you have a platter. And. And there are days where I just wanted. I think I do intentionally choose to be frustrated. I'm like, no, I want to throw a tantrum.

I do, too. And I think that's important because, you know, everyone talks about this toxic positivity that. And kind of messaging that is. Seems to be a problem. And, I'm totally in agreement that it's normal to feel negative emotions. And in fact, being an entrepreneur, owning your own business is really great practice in allowing emotions and. Or attitudes, if you want to call them this. Okay. But the better you get at allowing discomfort, the more successful you will be. my coach, Brooke Castillo, used to say this. She used to say, the price to be successful as an entrepreneur is discomfort. Right? Like, are you willing to. To be frustrated? Yes. We're creating it up here, and so sometimes you just allow the frustration. but are you willing to be nervous? Are you willing to be uncomfortable?

You know, entrepreneurs need tactics. We need practical strategies to go out and try

I was just talking to a woman who is a lactation consultant, and she, she wants to go into pediatrician's offices and leave her information so that she can get referrals, right? And she's like, I went into one and I took donuts in my card and it was just so awkward. And they just looked at me like I was crazy. And I don't think I said the right thing. And I just don't know how you do that, how you approach these doctors. So I haven't done anything since. And I was just like, oh, you thought it was going to be comfortable? You thought this was going to be easy when you decided to start. I don't know where you got that idea, but it's going to be uncomfortable. It's going to be hard. And when you. That's the. What. Why I love working with entrepreneurs, because everybody, I guarantee listening to this is like, yeah, I've done plenty of uncomfortable, hard things, but we have to keep going through that process. and so that's an important part of it. And I always tell people, listen, 95% of the time, whatever your brain is telling you is fine. You just think what you're thinking, you feel how you're feeling. You just go through the muscles. But there's that 5% of the time when, if you're feeling stuck, maybe your business isn't progressing in an area, maybe you're feeling stagnant, maybe you have that nagging thing that you're not. You're like, I know I need. I should be trying this thing, and I'm just not trying it. Or. Or I need to solve this problem and I'm just kind of putting it off. That's when you want to go in and go, okay, what is happening up here? That will allow me to do the tactics. We also need tactics. We need practical strategies to go out and try and do. But there's a reason why we're not doing them, and it's because of what's happening up here. It's your attitude in the end and that's when you want to go look at it.

I seriously, I love that we're having this conversation because I started this, my program, Landscape Lighting Secrets about five years ago and it's not like I held anything back. It's like, no, this is the exact steps I use to build a multimillion dollar lighting business. It's not like, well, reserve some of this for the, the real secrets. You know, it's all there. Like is exactly what I did. And I don't have 100 success rate. Not everyone just goes through it and does the thing.

Right.

It's just kind of evidence of what you're talking about because like they have the tactic, like you know, the tool, you know, if you just say this script, if you just do these things but at the same time if you say the script with the wrong attitude, did you really say the right script?

Well, and it's the little tiny nuances, right, that like you can give somebody this A to Z steps of how you got to where you are and you have. Right. But there's always going to be little nuances that you have to tweak and adjust either to make it your own or to fit your particular situation. And And so yeah, there's nothing wrong with. I'm a big fan of people like to start out, just get someone that has done what you're trying to do, ask them what to do and then go do it. I think that's the best way to get started. Like just do your best to imitate it. But that's always going to be version one. Right. And then half of it's not going to work for you and you're going to go, why didn't this work for me? It worked for Ryan. And then you're going to have to iterate a little bit into version two, which is like, okay, but I'm not Ryan, so I have to make some at least small tweaks in just even the verbiage I use. Right. Like his script is a great starting point, but now I have to make this my own a little bit so that I can deliver it in the right way. That gets me the result I'm trying to get. And so that happens from again having the right attitude as soon as.

A lot of entrepreneurs will use Facebook ads to generate leads

And even this, I don't know if you're. Do you use Facebook ads ever or do you teach people to use ads to generate leads and things? Yeah, so whatever used to generate leads, a lot of My coaches and myself will use Facebook ads, and they'll come to me and they'll say, my Facebook ad isn't working. And they think they're telling me about their Facebook ad. They're like, it's not converting. And, I'm like, do you think that's a fact, or do you think that's your thoughts? And they're like, well, it's a fact. And I would say, no, it's not. It's your summary of the facts. Because what does it mean for a Facebook ad to work? I just had a call, actually, with my marketing person. She's like, this funnel isn't converting. I was like, of course it's converting. It's just converting at $400 for a $100 sale. So we gotta fix that. But it's still. It's convert. Like, it's not converting. Just a thought. And I was like, and don't forget about all the leads we've generated from the people that didn't convert, but they opted into the thing. And what is our cost per lead? Because actually, that's a really good cost per lead. So who cares if we didn't get a sale this month? We'll get the sale off of them maybe in three months or six months. So you just have to be able to separate out facts from stories. And again, not that you think positively about everything, but it's so discouraging and frustrating building a business that if you don't do this work along the way, to have fun with it, to iterate to play with it, to not make it mean something personal, to not get all heavy and discouraged, then you'll either give up or you'll just get comfortable and stop growing at some point. And I've done that myself, so I'm preaching to myself, by the way. Yeah, I've done that. At times.

It's. Well, it's so easy to get comfortable. It's. It's human nature. It's. We, like, our bodies just want to be comfortable. You know, like, if it's cold outside, we just figure out a way to warm up. Like, it's just normal. But entrepreneurs, if you want to be successful, like, you have to go against that. You have to break that pattern. And we didn't know all this when we were signing up, starting a business. We just thought we didn't want to work for somebody else because our boss was mean to us.

And now we have that right. And how often do people. You know, we get to the. The thing we were trying to achieve. And then there's. There's still another milestone, which is great. I'm all for people, like, continuing to grow, but not if you're going to feel bad about where you are.

Yeah. Or complain.

Like, at what point do we decide to celebrate and go. Look at us. We're doing it. This is fun. What a cool world we live in. Who knew? Like, look at the opportunity around us.

You seem to not be suffering from perfectionism as an entrepreneur

So anyway, all of that is your attitude. And I, I. From the little bit I know you, and I don't know you very well, but from the little bit that we've had, I can tell that, like, that kind of winning attitude. I don't know if you work hard at it or it comes naturally to you, but you have that right. You have that. one thing I'll just point out is you seem to not be suffering from perfectionism. Right. Which is really useful as an entrepreneur. Like you said to me, the reason I do this podcast live is because I don't want to bother going back and editing it. Hope it's okay that I shared that.

that was my secret. Thank you.

Sorry, I just gave away the light. The secret, everyone. no, but that kind of thinking. We're not trained that way. Right. Like, you look at our kids in school and it's like, get the best grade you can try to get. Like, get A's, or at least make sure you put in your best effort. And we gotta win the game. If we're on a sports team when we gotta, like, we're taught that we should give our best effort to everything, then you decide to start a business. And I'm always telling my theory is B minus. Aim for B minus. Don't try to do a work. There's certain areas where you're going to want to do a work. Right. Maybe when it comes to delivering for your customers or something like that. Right. But most of the things in your business don't need to be a work. B minus is going to get the job done. It's going to. And it's going to allow you to go faster. And, are there going to be mistakes? Yeah, so what? We don't need it everything to be a level. So that's just an example of an attitude. Doesn't sound like saying, I just want to do my best at all of this stuff. Doesn't sound like a negative attitude. So the question isn't always, is it positive or negative? Is this attitude serving you? Is it helping you accomplish your goals? Because if not, we need to question it. Maybe you shouldn't be doing your best at everything. Maybe you should just do most things. B minus.

Yeah, I love that. no, that, that, that helps me a lot too. And no, this does not come natural for me. I have to work like crazy to get to this because I want to be a perfectionist. I do care what people I say. I don't care what people think about me, but I do. You know what I mean? Like, I'm embarrassed if I put out something bad or what if I screw up right now or whatever, I'll be like, man, that was dumb. Maybe I should pre recorded it and edited it. Right? But I still just take action. I know.

And that's the thing that, that just tells us that you're not a psychopath or a sociopath. We all care about what people think. So that's, that's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is like, you don't let that hold you back. You manage your mind is what I call it. The part of you that's like, oh, we don't want to mess up in front of people goes, it's okay, it's not the end of the world. We'll probably do fine. And if we do mess up, it's not that big of a deal. We're just going to go anyway. We're not going to like you have that part, but it's not driving your car. You purposely put it in the passenger seat or in the backseat and go forward anyway. And that's what it takes to be an entrepreneur, is to be able to set aside those parts of you that aren't serving you in the name of creating what you want.

Yeah, well said. I like the aim for B minus because I've never done that. I always do aim for the A and then, you know, you're disappointed, whatever holds you back. But I've, I've for some reason and I think it just been through a lot of different work, but I'm, I just know that doesn't matter what I do, there's going to be a certain number of times you're going to have to fail or fall down. And so I just try to get over with as fast as possible.

It's like, yeah, that's so good.

If I worried about like the first 20 episodes of this show, oh, I wouldn't have ever started it.

That's right.

You know, and now it's like, yeah, people are like, oh, you're so good at it. You're, natural. Like, no, like you can go back. I'M sure I didn't watch episode one, but you probably could. And you're probably like, people have told me they go, when people. When people find about your podcast, tell them to start with, like, episode one. Because there's, like, this story and this development. I'm like, there is. That wasn't intentional, but it's just, like, natural, you know? So I think that's the biggest thing is, like, you just have to be willing to fail fast, fail often.

That's so good.

The first time you try something new, you probably are going to suck at it

it reminds me of. I don't know if you ever heard of Myron golden, but he says, oh, what's that? You know him?

Yeah. Well, I mean, I.

You've heard of him? Yes, yes. Okay.

Mastermind. I was in. Okay.

Isn't he the best? Do you love him? So you may have heard him say this, but he, He says it's always working. It's either working for you or it's working on you. Right? So I love that. Thinking about that in my business, when I'm just like, oh, I can't get this working. And then I remember, okay, it's working on me right now. And to your point, the best way to let it work on me faster is to keep doing things. Not to sit back and, like, it's, I personally love to, like, listen to a YouTube video, read another book, take another class. That's how I want to, like, grow and learn and develop. But that is the slow way, right? I have to get out there and do it and do it not well. Like, just be willing to suck at it. And that's the way that you get better, way faster.

So, yeah, hopefully we're encouraging someone out there that, like, literally, the first time you try something new, you probably are going to suck at it. And then the second time, you still will, it just won't be as bad. And then the third time, a little bit better. And fourth, like, eventually it works. And too many people try one thing. One time, they, oh, they're like, oh, I hired a salesperson. That doesn't work. I'm just not cut out for. It's like, no, it does work. It just didn't work the way you did it. Like, right, you give up now. Like, you're giving up on this whole full potential. Like, there's so much opportunity in front of you, and you've just settled to be like, well, just stay. Stay in my. My lane, and this is the life I'm going to live. Which, again, if that's what you want and you've succeeded and you're on the mountain and the summit of where you're at, then that's great. Celebrate it, be happy. But most people aren't there in their life right now.

Yeah, I would say it's like someone gave you a recipe for chicken parm, and you're like, I tried that. It didn't work. That recipe doesn't work. You're like, no, that recipe does work. You just didn't work. You might need to try it a few more times. Right.

You definitely put in the wrong ingredient. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

That's awesome. I went, I went on a church mission when I was 19, and I knew nothing. I was a mama's boy. My mom took care of me and did everything. And we go to the grocery store and to buy food, which I went to Portugal. I didn't know the language. And this. Luckily, this old lady, like, helping me order. I'm just like, I think I'll just order some ham, because I could just eat ham sandwiches. And so I was like. I'm like, I'm, like, sitting there trying to speak to her, and I'm realizing no one ever taught me how to order ham. Like, how am I going to do this? And so she taught me. She's like, quinientos gramos de fiambre. And that's 500 grams of ham. Like, they slice up whatever. So I was like, okay, cool. And then I go, I'm gonna just eat spaghetti. So I buy all these noodles, and then I buy sauce. And then I'm like, well, I need seasoning. And my mom used to put brown, sugar in our, like, ragu or whatever, you know? And, so I was like, I'm gonna get some brown sugar. Well, I don't know how to say brown sugar. And I grabbed this thing that looks like brown sugar, and I cook it up, I pour it in there, and literally, I, like, so excited. and I made, like, enough for a week because, you know, I'm just going to come home to the apartment and have leftovers for a week. And that's all my food was, was some ham and some spaghetti. And I put in the seasoning, and I go to take the first bite, and it was disgusting. It was so bad. This has to do with your recipe thing. And I. Instead of buying brown sugar, I bought cinnamon. And I put. So I had, like, a ton of cinnamon in this spaghetti and had no choice but to eat it all week long. It was terrible.

And look at you now. It really toughened. It was working on you.

I think that's why people burn out or give up on business

So, yeah, you're like, no, spaghetti doesn't work. Like, no, it just didn't work.

It works. You just didn't quite figure it out. And again, I know you and I are both talking to ourselves here, like, you know, I. It doesn't matter what level I've gotten to in my business. It's just a new. New level. New devil, as they say, right? That I'm like, now I'm trying to figure out this thing, and it's so frustrating. And anyway, I. I just think that's why people burn out or give up on business, though, is because I.

One of my favorite ideas is that it could just be fun. And I'll tell you where I came up with this

One of my other favorite, thoughts is that it could just be fun. And I'll tell you where I came up with this because it might be helpful to some of your listeners. I worked. Like I said, I worked in corporate, so before I was a leadership coach and trainer, I did sales. And so there was lots of pressure there of like, okay, what are you going to do this month? What numbers are you going to bring in? And there was projections, and they wanted you to hit your numbers and forecasting in this big company that relied on it, all right? And so if you didn't hit your number, it was, like, very disappointing. And anyway, lots of heaviness every month, a new number to hit. And then I, Before I became a life coach, I started working for a little while for Brooke Castillo, who owns the life coach school where I was trained and just doing some basic recruiting into her school. And so I kind of brought that same mindset with me of like, okay, we got these numbers, and these were big numbers we were trying to hit. And one month, I got on a zoom call with her to check in, and I started crying. She's like, why are you crying? And I'm like, I. I'm nowhere near my goal for this month. Like, I've been trying everything I can. I don't mean to give excuses, but I'm just not gonna come anywhere close to it. And I don't know what else to try. And she was like, but why are we. Why are you crying? I was like, I just. I feel so bad. She's like, why do you feel bad? And she was just. So she goes, listen, I don't want you to hit that number. What number are you going to get to? And I gave her. It was like, half the amount or whatever. Okay, I'm going to get this number of students in your class. And she was like, okay, that's all I want. Don't worry about it. It's totally fine. Like, this is all just for fun. She would say, now, this was her livelihood. This is how she supported her family and everything. So. But she really put her money where her mouth was there, where she was like, this is just for fun. You and I could go get jobs if we wanted. There's, like, so many ways to make money, but is fun, right? We're, We started this business because we want independence and we want whatever. And. Okay, so she does that, and then, you know, a month later, after she lets me process everything and whatever, then we get on the phone and she's like, let's talk about what happened and let's dissect this. And she's like, listen, this is all just for fun. And then we set a. I'm, not kidding. I would call it a 10x goal because she raised the price massively on her program, and we increased how many she wanted me to get in there. And she was like, let's just play in our minds with what we could do and what we could try and what we could experiment with. And. And, you know, she was going to compensate me really well for it, too. And she. So she was like, let's hit that number. Not because you have to, but just because wouldn't it be cool if we did, like, just a couple women at home with a laptop? And I was like, yeah, that would be cool. She's like, let's just do that. And so when I gave myself permission to stop making it so heavy and serious and I'm going to be in trouble or we're not going to have the revenue, and I was just, no, you know what would be fun? Let's do that. Then I was able to blow it out of the water. And I'm so grateful I had that experience because as I've grown my own business, when I start getting too serious and heavy again, back to the attitude thing, I'm just like, whoa, Jody Moore, it doesn't seem like you're having much fun right now.

Yeah.

what if we made what would make this more fun? And from fun, we actually have so many better ideas. We get more creative, we get more, you know, inventive, and we're capable of so much more. So that's one of my favorite thoughts. I'm always like, well, this is going to be fun, dude.

I love it. Yeah, it could just be fun. Like, I like it because it does take off that pressure. Like, and what. Let's just, like, let's just fantasize, like, what if we did this. Like, what, what would we have to do? And it's like, do this. Could do that. I'm, I'm actually. It relates to a phrase I'm trying to, to be famous one day and I want to, you know, like my favorite quote is Henry Ford. Whether you think you can or think you can't, you're right. I was like, man, everyone knows that quote. Like, what if there was a quote one day that people were like, oh, that Ryan Lee guy.

oh, that Ryan Lee quote.

Yeah. So I needed to refine it, but it has to do with what you're talking about.

Yeah. Let's hear it.

It's really, it's go to work because you want to, not because you have to.

Yes.

Hey. Huh?

it's, it is, it's everything, right? Because again, different energy that you're going to show up from and you're going to get a totally different result if you want to, versus you have to. I'm going to start sharing it with more people. Ryan.

Yeah. Would you give me the credit? That'd be cool.

I will.

You have a podcast and a book called Better than Happy

I want to ask you, last time you were on here, I'm like, I don't even think we talked about this, but you have your own podcast, you've written a book, you've done some really, really cool stuff. You're still doing really cool stuff. And I can't just wait to see what else you do. But let's talk about Better Than Happy. That's the name of your podcast, right?

Yeah, that is. That's my podcast and my book. They're both called Better than Happy. so I like that name a lot because, you know, we all say, well, I mean, I just want to be happier. I just want my kids to be happy. And happiness feels like the most noble pursuit. And I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to be happy. I think that's natural. But, as I've, you know, gotten deeper into the work I do now as a coach, happy is not meant to be our full time stage state. If we define happiness as the way. I like the definition, I like the best, I should say is happiness is that moment when you don't want anything to be different than it is. And so I hope we all have lots of moments like that. And they're usually, sometimes they're big moments every now and again, but mostly they're just little fleeting things, you know, like that moment when the you made dinner and everybody likes it. Maybe you can't relate to that. But as a mom, I'm like, everybody's like, mom, this is so good. And everybody's eating it. And I didn't have to make an extra meal for somebody.

I think that only happened once last year.

Yeah, that was like, very rare, right?

Yeah.

So it's, it's little moments like that when you're like, there's, I wouldn't change anything about this moment now. It only lasts a moment because then, in the next moment something will change, you know, even if it's just a little thing like now we got to do the dishes or whatever. So happiness is meant to be in moments like that. But we're not actually designed to just sit and love the way everything is and not want anything to be different. We're designed to grow personally, which means we're going to want to be different and better in ways that we think would serve us and to contribute to the world in making it better, better. So we're actually wired, this is why negativity is such a problem. Because the brain is wired well, first to look out for danger and harm, right? Because we're survival beings at our core, but also to look for opportunities where we could make things better. And so it's natural to go, you know what? That could be better. That could be easier. This, this should be different. I don't agree with that. And so better, than happy is just kind of my way of saying like, yeah, happiness is good, but there's something beyond it, which is being able to notice and make a contribution and grow and develop yourself and improve your relationships and, make more money or whatever your goals are. And you don't have to do that from dissatisfaction or unhappiness. You can just do it from an awareness of like. But it could be better, right? Like, this is cool. This is great. I'm grateful for this. And I want more. And people think it's either or, right? They're like, no, I'm just grateful for what I have and cool. I'm all for gratitude, but gratitude and wanting more is how I believe the human beings are wired. And that's when we thrive. Because our wanting more is not just, let's go, let's go get what we can get. It's how do I add more value to the world as I create more of what I want in my life? It's a win win when we live that way. So that's, that's what I mean by better than happy.

Okay, that's good. That's a Good perspective. I was like, yeah, I don't know what that means. I want to be better than happy, though.

I also kind of want people not knowing. So then they'll. Then they'll tune in and see. Yeah, exactly.

How do we find gratitude when things are awesome or bad

Well, I mean, you mentioned gratitude. It's so easy for me to be grateful when things are awesome. I'm like, thank you, God. Thank you, people. Thank you, everyone. I'm a grateful person. But then when things are spinning and my life's falling apart and my business seems not working, I'm like, I'm not grateful.

Yeah.

M. How do I change this? So how do we find gratitude in those moments? It's easy again, like looking backward, it's like, oh, yeah, you throw a kid in the deep end, they learn how to swim, like after the fact. That's why you have the gratitude. But in the moment, how do we find that as humans?

I don't think I would say that you need to always find gratitude. I think it's okay to have moments of whatever it is, frustration, self pity, even victim mentality. I think another part of better than happy is like the 5050 of the human experience, which is half the time you're meant to feel happy and positive and grateful, and half the time you're going to feel frustrated, discouraged, etc. That is a complete human experience. And so what I would say to people is the fastest way to move through the negative and get back to something more useful or more positive is to allow the negative and not judge yourself or think that you need to hurry and get out of it, which we're not very good at doing. Most of us weren't taught as kids how to allow negative emotions. Our parents were like, don't cry, it's okay. And they try to talk us out of it. And so we're taught like, okay, try to get out of that state as fast as you can or push it away or at least try to hide it because it makes people uncomfortable around you. And, you know, they, they meant well, but I think we know better now that that doesn't, that doesn't work. It doesn't solve it for people. So instead, what I try to do with my kids when they're upset is, you know, it's all based on age, of course. But like, when I have a young kid crying, for example, because he's scared to go to school, I'm like, okay, are you scared right now? It's okay to be scared. I get scared sometimes too. Let's go ahead and take some deep Breaths. And, you can just be afraid if you need to. I'm sorry that you're afraid. Like, you don't. I'm not afraid for you because I know that you're going to be safe at school. But if you want to be scared right now or you need to be scared, that's totally fine. Do you need to cry? It's okay to cry. So it's. It's like allowing emotions and teaching kids that they're normal, natural. We all feel them. so then as you get older, right, if you're, like you said, your life is spinning out of control, you're like, I'm not feeling very grateful right now. The most harmful thing we can do is go. I should be more grateful. How am I going to get into gratitude? I think it's okay to go. Well, what am I feeling? I'm feeling, let's say hopeless. Okay, Jody? Well, you can feel hopeless if you need to. It's not real. Like, it's not. I'm not saying it's true. Your life is hopeless. It's never going to get better. I'm just saying you're having sentences in your head that are making you feel hopeless. Because really, you're fine, right? You're sitting in your house right now. Everything's okay. Kids are just at school. As far as, you know, everything's fine.

So find out in, like, 15.

Take some deep breaths when you're feeling anxious or worried

We'll find out soon, but just take some deep breaths. It's okay to feel hopeless. It's just part of being a human being.

Once you. Once you do that, like, how long is that okay? Because I feel like people have the tendency to just, like, stay in that state. Is there. Is there a way to reset and get out of. Get out of that or, like. Because I get what you're saying. I mean, I've tried to. I've had to do that myself. I've had to do that with my kids. And, like, dude, it's totally cool. Like, yeah, you know, like, it's okay to be scared. I. I would probably be scared, too, if I had to go to that school. But.

Yeah.

how long should we stay in it? how long is that acceptable?

Well, I would say that 90% of the time, if you really just open up to it. I like to. I find moving my body helps. So, like, go for a run, go for a walk, figure out what helps. If I, I. If I'm feeling worried or anxious or something, especially I'll go for a walk. And I just notice the anxiety in my belly. I notice it there. I take deep breaths. I'm just like, okay, I can feel this as long as I need to. It. When I really just allow it, it really just goes away within usually like an hour or so, especially if I go for a walk. But if I'm really stuck on it, right? And I. Sometimes this happens where now we grow even more bitter, more resentful, or more worried. And it can't even grow right. Usually what that is is a sign that you're in your head, not in your body. Emotions happen in your body, and your body knows what to do with them. They're just chemicals in your body. What happens in the head is the thoughts spin and we start building more evidence for what we're believing. Like, yeah, and also this. And don't forget that. And what about this and that? Now we're noticing things through that lens. So the story on the news becomes like, see? And the economy's going down and, oh, that person's business is struggling, too. Look, this is all going to crash. So it's happening up here, right? And that's when you want to do exactly what we were talking about in the beginning, which is like, whoa, hold on. I don't think this is just me allowing human experience anymore. I think this is me spinning in my head with an attitude that isn't going to serve me. So let's just separate out the facts from thoughts. What are the facts? Facts are, I just lost my best employee. That's not even a fact. I just had an employee quit my business. My thoughts are. That was my best employee. I don't know what I'm going to do now. you know, those are all thoughts. Okay, let's get a handle on the difference between facts and thoughts and decide what we want to think here.

Nice. And then it's like, how do I want to feel? I feel anxiety, stressed out. What am I going to do? Hopeless. How do I want to feel? Do the reverse framework. Okay, What. What are my thoughts to develop that.

This is why I'm a fan of everybody having a business mentor or a coach of some sort. Because, like, if. If they have someone like you, Ryan, that's. That's a little bit ahead of them or had some success they can learn from. Right? You're going to have a bunch of thoughts to offer them. Like, this is normal. Everyone goes through it. You're going to be fine. Here's what you do. Here's some strategies, and we borrow more useful attitudes from somebody that we trust. it's sometimes hard on your own to come up with them. You can do it. But, a mentor, a coach, a guide who's done this before, you will usually be able to easily sell you on a different story that you're like, you're right. What was I thinking? I'm going to be fine.

Yeah.

So, anyway, that's awesome.

Jody Moore: It's been fun talking to you guys

Well, thank you so much. I really appreciate you coming on and sharing your ideas, your frameworks. I've taken a ton of notes. selfishly, thank you for this session.

Yeah, thanks for having me. It's been. Been fun talking to you.

for those that want to reach out to you, what's the best way to get a hold of you, your podcast, your book, and be part of your ecosystem?

Yeah, I would say, my podcast is better than Happy. You can get it anywhere you find podcasts. And, I'm pretty active on Instagram. Jody Moore coaching, if you want to get some more help there.

Awesome. Well, thanks again, Jody. I appreciate it. Now, the hard part, guys, you just have to implement some of these things. It's always the hardest part. But, we're here to help you. So I, encourage you to reach out to Jodi. Follow her on Instagram, Reach, out on her podcast, get her book, Better, than Happy. Thanks so much, Jody. Appreciate you coming on.

Thanks for having me.

All right, guys, have an awesome week. We'll see you next week. And, remember, just keep moving forward. You got this.